Keeping the parents informed

So it is just over 6 months to our wedding. During the entire process, thinking of things to do, trying to get them done, organizing and planning - it is quite easy to forget that the parents are an integral part of this as well. So as a dutiful son or daughter, one must also take the time to meet up with both sides and let them know what is going on, touch base, and check that the expectations are aligned.

For instance, if like us, your dinner venue is small (26 tables is comfortable, max of 30 incl 2 reserve tables), managing the parents' enthusiasm to invite friends and relations from way back is absolutely necessary. I have assigned a certain number of tables to them, and I hope that they are able to keep within that number.

I met up with Shermaine's parents recently, and talked to them about the Guo Da Li (approx conducted 1-2 weeks prior to the actual day). Since neither of us knew who was supposed to give what to whom, and how many, I had assured them that we will be getting the list, after consulting with the traditional wedding gifts fella. Using this list, we will then ask the parents to check off which items they absolutely must have, and which are optional. I also informed them of the exchange in Ang Paos, including the dowry (or pin jin which they have to return a portion of) and the err.. Ang Pao for Sherm's mom for bringing her up (I shan't mention the exact name here, its quite crude lol), which she gets to keep. Of the gifts we bring over during the Guo Da Li, we should also indicate the exact number which the in-laws have to return to us. This I will consult with said traditional wedding gifts fella.

The follow-up meeting between the parents where all this will be finalized will be at the official food-tasting session at Grand Park City Hall, about 2 months prior to the big day. During this dinner, all terms and requests should be brought up for discussion between the 2 families.